I have lost things
I have lost people
But you
You are neither
And yet when I think of
The worst loss
The most painful loss
The most life changing loss
I think of you
I didn't get a sympathy card when you died
I didn't get a hug
I didn't get understanding
I just got lonely
You are dead to me
But alive to so many
You are their strength
A loss they may never mourn
So what do I do
Where do I go
Who do I trust
When do I believe
Why does this still hurt
Here's the irony
If I could resurrect you
Bring you back to life
I would walk past your grave
Leave my tears
And let you lie
© Ruby Neumann
Poet's Note: Written February 4, 2022. I think some of my favourite and most honest expressions of poetic verse come to me when I am in the hot tub. When I made the tombstone picture, I couldn't put a date on it. This loss has been slow and over a span of time I can't nail down in my own mind, much less put on a tombstone. This morning, I was thinking about losses in my life that have gone unnoticed. This poem is for them too. The hugs and cards are absent, yet the pain is very present.
