When Mother’s Day Hurts

It’s about that time for Mother’s Day

And I find myself in thought

Of others, of me, and of the hurt

Of what this day has brought

Mother’s Day hurts for her

For her it’s a day of pain

The one who called her Mom is dead

And she’s reminded all over again

Mother’s Day hurts for him

For him it’s a day of pain

The one whom he called Mom is dead

And he’s reminded all over again

Mother’s Day sometimes hurts for me

For me it’s a day of some pain

For I never had someone know me as Mom

And each year, I’m reminded again

What do I do when this day comes

And I’m met with fallen tears

For some it’s not “Happy Mother’s Day” 

And it hasn’t been in years

For me, I’m not a mother

I never had a girl or boy

But I still have my mother with me

And I still have reason for joy

So each year as this day arrives

I spend it with my Mom

And, if I can, I share her with others

Until the day is done

I want to pass along a hug

If Mother's Day hurts for you

If that day only gives you pain

Then this is something that you might do

When this day rolls around each year

Find a mother somewhere to love

Share some time and words with her

And thank her with a hug

Or maybe there is a child 

That needs a hug from a mom

Maybe that is in you to give

To pass along your love

When Mother’s Day hurts for you

Please don’t let it end in your sorrow

Find someone to share some joy with

And give them a brighter tomorrow

© Ruby Neumann

Poet's Note: 

It is May 13, 2019 and it is the day after Mother's Day.  A lot of emotion is wrapped up in this one, and it came out as I tried reading the poem to my Mom.  

Yesterday, Mom and I spent the day at our former high school in rural Saskatchewan for the annual graduation celebration (which traditionally lands every year on Mother's Day).  We didn't know anyone graduating, but we were "in the neighbourhood", so we spend the morning and afternoon there. We watched the grads walk on stage and be acknowledged for all their hard work.  And then they walked off the stage and were given a red rose to give to their Mom.  I remembered my graduation on Mother's Day, 1987 and the moment I walked down those steps with a red rose and went to give it to my Mom.  So I chose that picture today, because that was one of my most joyous Mother's days and I have photographic evidence of it!!! 

Yesterday, after our visit to our high school, we drove to my cousin's place and I was able to share my mom with two of my cousins who were missing their mom on Mother's Day. 

I understand how days like Mother's Day can hurt and when I thinking of those who will be shedding tears, that goes right to my heart.  And that is where this poem comes from.  

Edited April 26, 2024.. Five years ago I wrote this poem.  Five years later, my mom and I plan to go back to our high school and spend a part of Mother's day together there.  It will be Mom's first mother's day without the one who made her a mother.  This poem rings true again.